I've spent about 95% of this weekend in my chair or bed... recouping from the previous round of chemo as well as some sort of cold/congestion/aches. The best part about that is that I'm not neutropenic, so I don't have to take my temp and constantly fear infections. Fine by me! It's all relative, eh? I have really enjoyed the rest and not having any agenda to meet.
I also must add that I've eaten veggie dogs, baked beans and home-made mac-n-cheese the past three days. What else is Memorial Day weekend for??? Overdoin' it, indeed.
If my platelets are up high enough (which will be revealed via blood work tomorrow morning), I am scheduled to be readmitted to Emory tomorrow for my final round of inpatient chemo - round 8. Not really sure how to process the arrival of this milestone just yet... so I'll sit on it for a bit over the next week and see what comes up. Sometimes, I'm not really in touch with how I feel about things.
The one thing I do know to be true is that there is quite a bit about this process that I don't want to end. While I surely want to feel normal again and regain strength and health and have some semblance of stability, I am not ready to jump back into life in high gear again.
I don't want life to return to it was before this started. It's probably naive to think that's even a possibility, because I am forever changed in a lot of ways... but if I know myself, I know that I am prone to a happy-go-lucky, ignorance-is-bliss default that could creep in. That's the piece I suspect will not return as it was.
Today is the 4th anniversary of Candace's mom's death. Be sure to read her blog and get a glimpse into her world on this day.
Our Brand Is Crisis (2015)
8 years ago
3 comments:
Good luck Stu! Praying for you and Candace!
Hey, kids, I did read Candace's blog about her mother and I kept thinking "If Only" this or that. I lost my mother in 2000 on the day Jenny and David returned from their honeymoon. How I yearn for the day when I see her again! I've attached a bird house onto the one integral vase that is allowed by the cemetery and hope that one of the little killdeer birds nest in it.
You kids have been in my thoughts ever since I heard about your illness and I'm ready for you to venture on into your new life experiences, whatever they may be. My prayer is that you two are changing diapers a year from now. Woo Hoo!
God bless you. Hope you are having a good week. Be strong and of good courage.
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